An(other) Introduction To Waspinator-For-President

Waspinator, as if you needed to be told, is a Predacon from the tv series Beast Wars, a long defunct descendant of the Transformers franchise. Relatively speaking, he has almost nothing to do with this blog.

Thursday, 1 September 2011

A Growing List Of Reasons Why We Live In A Really, Really Imperfect World


Where I live, you can't order pizza when you get up in the morning.

When that pizza doesn't come, it's also not delivered by Michaela Strachan, 20 years ago when she was hot. 

When that pizza doesn't come, and it's not delivered by Michaela Strachan, 20 years ago when she was hot, I still have to get up instead of going back to sleep to dream about Michaela Strachan 20 years ago when she was hot.

When that pizza doesn't come, and it's not delivered by Michaela Strachan, 20 years ago when she was hot, and I still have to get up instead of going back to sleep to dream about Michaela Strachan 20 years ago when she was hot, I have to go into work. 

My place of work does not employ Michaela Strachan.

Time machines do not exist, and cannot be used to go back in time 20 years, or, for that matter, to watch yourself in bed with that hot chick who you broke up with the day (just one day!) before you got your digital camera.

Aforementioned hot chick's name was not Michaela Strachan. 



Notes:

1. 'Michaela Strachan' is, of course, used here as a metaphor. 
2. A metaphor that I should have used 20 years ago.